FRISCO — It’s not the first Father’s Day that Brian Schottenheimer is missing his dad, Marty, but not having him now hits a little different.
Brian enters his first year as a head coach of an NFL team, and for 20-plus years as an assistant coach he had his father around.
In 2021, Marty died of Alzheimer’s disease, something he battled for 10 years. Brian could always visit, talk or just hold his father’s hand.
Brian is now the head coach of the Cowboys, fulfilling a lifelong dream he can’t share with his father. It makes this Father’s Day a little more special.
“I know he’s proud,” Schottenheimer said, holding back tears when asked about his father. “I miss him. I would tell him that I used all the life lessons that he taught me, not just about football but about life and being a good man, a good husband and a good father and I think I’m doing OK for myself. I know he’s proud.”
Marty Schottenheimer is a member of an exclusive club.
Marty was a head coach for 21 years with four NFL teams. He’s one of eight head coaches with 200 or more career victories. Five of those coaches are in the Pro Football Hall of Fame, including former Cowboys coach Tom Landry. The other two, Andy Reid and Bill Belichick, have nine Super Bowl titles between them.
Brian Schottenheimer knows the résumé better than anyone and uses the football knowledge he received from his father to this day. With his father gone, Schottenheimer speaks to people close to him.
“I miss him like crazy,” Schottenheimer said of his father. “I actually lean on some of his friends now, guys like Bill Cowher. I know he coached with [in Kansas City]. But Father’s Day will be a special day. I’m a father of two amazing kids, and I talked to my mom and I know he’s looking down on me.”
Schottenheimer’s family doesn’t forget how special their father was, on and off the field. To honor their dad the family s charitable organizations in the fight against Alzheimer’s. Brian’s sister, Kristen, participates in The Longest Day, part of the Alzheimer’s Association fundraiser to help pay for research into the disease.
During the NFL’s My Cause My Cleats weekend, where players and coaches wear cleats to their favorite charitable causes, Brian has the logo of the Alzheimer’s Association on his specialized footwear.
During his short time as head coach, Brian has mentioned his father numerous times, whether it’s how Marty would deal with players or practices. Brian said his father would never approve of music blasting at practice, something the Cowboys do.
Most of the things he’s doing as head coach, Brian wishes he could share with his father.
There are so many stories to tell. He wanted to tell him about his introductory news conference, which he figured would occur in the main conference room where the daily news conferences are held. That room holds an estimated 50 people. Instead, the news conference was held in the atrium, a much larger area.
“I was nervous and excited,” Schottenheimer said.
The new head coach calmed down after seeing several players waiting for him. It’s at that moment he knew things would be OK.
That scene is something Schottenheimer would like to relay to his dad.
Instead, he leans on his family, from his wife, two kids, mom and siblings.
So as he enters this quiet period of the offseason, he spends time with family on this Father’s Day thinking about his dad and all that he was taught.
Family and football, something he learned from his father.
“This has been, rightfully so, a long six or seven months,” he said. “So I’m going to spend some time with my son and my daughter and my wife. I won’t be too far away from my iPad and my phone. You have to do this. And our players have to do this. Family is important. When you’re hanging around the ones you love, that’s not just your family. That’s the guys in our inner circle. That’s the guys in the locker room.”
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